OCD (2)

OCD (2)

My room outside me is a mess,

I crave order inside my head;

My brain plays

Jigsaw games 

Over and over

To find the sane,

Peace.

No bones in me are broken,

My sense of self is stolen;

Invisible dice

Make me think twice

Odds and Evens

Wrong or right

Thoughts? 

Disorder tries to confine me -

It's not about 'neat and tidy'

But fearing

Everything

Obsessive compulsive

Questioning,

Doubt.

By LJ. Copyright 2016

Animal Rhyme

Animal Rhyme

What do you see in the field?

A beast that needs to be killed?

Or claws and fur that can feel,

As you do?

What do you see at the zoo?

Walking handbags and leather shoes?

Or curious creatures like you,

As longing?

What do you see on the farm?

Milk, breakfast and yarn?

Or eyes that look back in return,

At you too?

By LJ. Copyright 2016

White

White

The calmest colour is white.

I've craved it all my life.

And in this moment, white

Ceiling, bed and fur quiet

My mind, I hear my breath

Unwind into calm beneath

The white.

By LJ. Copyright 2016

Winter

Winter

Turning inwards, back against the cold,

Crushing leaves I proudly used to show.

Summer seems surreal, so long ago,

Withered branches hidden under snow.

What have the darker days and nights begun?

Running to the place that I can't run.

Even so I'm looking for the sun,

That state I knew, I know, that I came from.

By LJ. Copyright 2016

Therapy Cat

Therapy Cat

When there is panic inside my head,

You are calm, curled up on my bed.

When thoughts unpredictable alter my mood,

You are like clockwork asking for food.

When things are difficult to do that day,

You bring me a toy so I have to play.

When I sit overwhelmed by thoughts,

You sit with me, just because.

By LJ. Copyright 2016

OCD (1)

OCD (1)

Everything is magnified,
Molecules electrified,

In earth, in air, personified
As being something more.

And thought contests for speed of light,
No sound, a sudden inner sight

Compulsion to do what is right
Or what feels secure.

Whispers whirl to hurricanes

And dust becomes vast desert plains

All inside a mental game
To figure out the score.

By LJ. Copyright 2016